Little Doll

Papa M.'s new baby, to be given at Christmas. (Ordered from this Etsy shop - fabulous craftsmanship and customer service.)

 
If I had a dream for the world it would be that every child, girl or boy, should have a doll. There is something exceptionally special about those soft little beings made solely to be loved by a child. There is so much to be learned from caring for someone else, even if that someone is made of cloth or plastic. You find your empathy, caring for a doll, at it's deepest roots, because, no matter how good your imagination is, at your core you still know that even if you don't wrap Dolly up tight or you forget to give him his afternoon snack, Dolly won't freeze and certainly won't go hungry. Yet, it's still done, often with a great sense of urgency and seriousness. What vast wells of love must we doll caregivers have to love so mightily someone who doesn't really need us and will never be able to audibly thank us?

If everyone played with a doll there might be more of that empathy growing around us, rampant like dandelions in the height of spring, left to be plucked up and enjoyed by every passing person, gathered in bunches, worn in hair, handed in clumps to anyone we think might need it. If all little children had their own cloth companion to clutch, to whisper secrets to, to bring on adventures, we might invite the idea of companionship into our children's heads. It is a good thing to have a friend who listens to you and holds your words with silence and honor and trusts you to do the same.

If I could, I would be sure all children, girl or boy, felt no shame in wanting a doll. There is no right gender for a doll, nor is there no right age. There is not one doll that is better than another, whether it is the mama-made-with-love rag doll or the beautifully detailed store-bought doll. All dolls are just what they ought to be for whom they belong, just as we, those who love those dolls, are just as we ought to be for them.

It's That Time of Year

A lot of people (including myself, sometimes), lament the seasonal rushing that comes this time of year. Early in the fall, or even late summer, just as we're trying to drag on those last days of languorous sunlight, jack o' lanterns and witches and ghosts begin to appear on store shelves along with massive backs of orange and black candies. It's hard to believe there will be a time for such things when it's still warm enough to swim and you can't quite tell when to bring the cooler weather clothes down from the attic. But just as soon, just as mysteriously, those witches and ghosts disappear from the shelves (even before their counterparts have had a chance to walk the streets with ghoulish delight) and are replaced with shiny gold and red baubles, green tinsel, and images of the jolliest of men. The leaves are still falling from the trees, pumpkins still line steps, and nary a turkey has graced the table, but be damned if you do not immediately start thinking of snow and humming "Jingle Bells."

I am of two minds this time of year. First there is the thought, What on earth is the rush? If we spend two months celebrating the coming of Jesus, Santa and his elves, peace on earth and goodwill toward men, and the Elf on the Shelf, then by December 25th, aren't we going to be thoroughly sick of it all? I do believe there is an Elmo Christmas special from way back that makes this almost exact point: Elmo wishes it could be Christmas every day and, through the magic of a Muppet reindeer, is able to make that wish come true. As it turns out, spending an extended amount of time celebrating Christmas drains everyone of the excitement of the season, making it as thoroughly unspecial as a Tuesday in March. 

I say all this, and I am sure many who read this will agree with my sentiments, but as I type I can just see the cover of Truth in the Tinsel PDF hiding behind this open window on my computer screen. I have already checked Amazon and Etsy to track my orders of Christmas gifts twice this morning. And I have (I say this with a hung head) already played Christmas music (Granted! My mom and I are currently writing a children's Christmas story - more on that another time - and playing a little bit of Bing Crosby gets the creative juices flowing). As much as I want to put the breaks on all things Christmas, I can't help but feel a tiny bit of glee in the bottom of my stomach as I spot Christmas stockings for sale in local stores.

With Halloween coming at the end of this week, I'm finding myself feeling slightly bereft of sprightly Halloweeny spirit. I'm afraid my hankering for red and green lights and Christmas tunes has gotten in the way of enjoying the other two holidays that come before that most wonderful time of the year. I don't want it to be like that! I want to be excited to don my spider web earring and take E. and M. trick or treating. I want to sit down and feel thoroughly enchanted by Sparkle Stories sweet and only slightly spooky stories (we just listened to the Switch Witch this weekend and loved it). I want to think beyond all the wonderful handfuls of candy I know I'm going to eat Friday night (especially if the Switch Witch does make an appearance at our house...she may have to, depending on how much my husband and I eat).

The question I end up asking myself is how in sync do I want to be with the rhythm of the seasons and with my family? Thankfully, my littles are still thoroughly engrossed with what's just ahead of them that real thoughts about Christmas haven't entered their heads. I want to be where they are, excited about what's just ahead and instead of spending all my time looking just down the road. I do that naturally, it's in my temperament (and makes me completely Pisces), but with small children, when everything moves so damn fast to begin with, it does me little good to stretch my neck out and stare down the road ahead of me in this part of my life. So, I'm taking a step back from Christmas and asking myself the same question I have silently asked others - What *is* the rush?

New Year

After a wonderful Christmas (though a holiday I have to say I'm a bit happy to see the backside of - it's always a bit stressful to get everything and everyone together) it's that time I simply cannot avoid, being the goal maker (though I haven't yet quite hit "keeper") that I am.

New Year Goals (Can I ever NOT do this?):

Eat less (and better) and move more

• Try to introduce daily exercise into my life once more
• Try to eat "clean" and have a lot less sugar in my house in and in my body
• Try to work on planning ahead and prepping meals to make our eating a bit easier
• Maybe take up a new "sport" like snowshoeing or cross-country skiing

Organize and purge the ridiculous amount of kids' toys and baby clothes I have in our basement closet and attic

• Wash and properly store all of E.'s old baby clothes
• Properly store all of M.'s outgrown clothing, give away/return some that we were given on loan
• Make a final purge of the toys upstairs and donate/throw away what we don't want/need
• Properly store the toys we're going to hang on to
• Start a toy rotation program and create some "rainy day" bags and busy bags for the kids

 Write more!

• I would like to blog more...
• But more than that I'd like to write more fiction (many moons ago that is all I did, and I miss it quite a lot)

Read more!

• This is the easiest - crack open some more books!
• I want more poetry in my life, but I somehow have a huge problem picking up a book of poetry; maybe I need to find a website or something that will send a poem to my inbox on a daily basis? (Update: poets.org does this, so yay!)

What are your goals (or resolutions) this year?